I agree that small groups would be a good place to discuss issues-people can pick topics that apply to them. I also agree that parents are a good place to start-but surely you don’t think that needs to be the end of talking about sex?

I do think the church needs a theology more than ‘don’t do it while single, do it while married.’ I really don’t think it cuts it anymore. When we’re still telling people not to have sex until they are married, but hey don’t get married until you’re in your thirties… that leads to sexual sin. The church needs to address sexual sins, the fact that married sex is worth waiting for, birth control (Tim and I had several people attacking us when we were married while in bible college and did not want kids yet.)

I think Mars Hill is a good example- obviously that’s not all the church teaches on, but things do need to be addressed.

Jerry

The average pew dweller has no grasp of the sacrificial system in the Old Testament and its forshadowing of the New Testament, but he is drawn to the sex series.

Interestingly, in Mars Hill’s (MI) first sermon series, Rob Bell taught though the book of Leviticus – every week they had to find/make more room for more people than the previous Sunday…

#9) There’s no doubt the Bible says children are a blessing, but the Bible doesn’t seem to address the specific topic of birth control. Is this a black and white topic, or does it fall under liberties?”

#5 “How should Christian men and women go about breaking free from the bondage of sexual sin?”

#3 “How does a Christian date righteously; and what are the physical, emotional, and mentally connecting boundaries a Christian must set while developing an intimate relationship prior to marriage?”

In Week #3, he had a good number of things specifically relevant to singles – about those gifted with singleness who do not desire to marry, and on how a Christian should approach the entire subject of dating.

In Rob Bell’s book, Sex God, he has an entire chapter devoted to people who are single (and want to be that way), and the unscriptural way many of these folks are treated within the church.

Last November, my own church had a particular sermon devoted to topics of a sexual nature, covering parts of the the three questions Mars Hill (WA) is covering and some other related topics.

I agree with Christian P – it’s not an either/or, but it is a subject that we should not be afraid to broach or talk about in a forthright manner beyond simple do’s and don’t’s (as those are not necessarily where the real questions lie)…

Jerry, No humor, sarcasm, jesting, etc. We’re stuck up prudes that are too proud. We do allow self-deprecating humor though, especially from commenters that annoy us or don’t agree with us.

Look, sex by no means consumes the bible as a topic. Song of Solomon is not the reason to teach, it is a tool in teaching. The N.T. letters show that whatever the church is struggling with is important for discussion. Why do you guys assume that by taking two weeks or creating an environment of openness on sex in the church, that that means you have to cut out teaching/preaching on the rest of scripture? Isn’t that one of those logical fallacies we don’t like around here?

The church is about interacting, communicating, learning, growing, helping, encouraging, teaching, loving, serving, etc. If everythings going hunky dory for a couple and they don’t need any help in their relationship, that’s fine. But that’s probably the couple that should be mentoring another couple that is having problems. What makes that even more beneficial is when you have a community of people who can share their problems and struggles and their victories and wisdom. Like I said before, the pulpit helps create a church atmosphere on any and every subject. I’m pretty sure our people don’t have any problem talking with eachother about the sacrificial system in the O.T. (yes we still need more teaching, this particular point is on atmosphere) but they do have problems talking about marital issues (including sex), money, emotional struggles, and more.

It is not coincidental that as the western world obsesses about sex the church as well begins to focus on it. They do not preach on it in China (its obvious they know all about it), no preaching in Korea, and in reality it is the American church by and large that has bought into the circus.

There are numerous commandments in the Old Testament about the morality of it, but using the Song of Solomon as proof that God wants us to teach about the specifics in the bedroom including frequency is incredibly self serving and misinterpreted and wholly without Biblical substance.

The average pew dweller has no grasp of the sacrificial system in the Old Testament and its forshadowing of the New Testament, but he is drawn to the sex series.

Has anyone compiled a list of what the Bible says about sex? I’m thinking of a couple of NT passages, let’s see if we can make a big list. Maybe College Press published a ‘What the Bible Says about Sex’ book or maybe Herbert Lockyer published ‘All the Sex in the Bible.’

Hebrews says: Keep the marriage bed pure.

Corinthians says: We should only give up sex for a little while so that we can pray, and by mutual consent, and then come back together again. I think Paul said celibacy is good if you are called to that sort of life (as he apparently was) but that it was not for everyone.

Jesus says: God created marriage that divorce should only be because of infidelity. And I suspect that even then there is room for forgiveness.

Paul wrote in Corinthians a whole bunch of stuff about virgins, marriage (which is, too, a charis), incest and excommunication. Of course Corinth was a whack place to live anyhow.

Ephesians talks about marriage being a symbol of the relationship between Christ and His church.

Jesus went to a wedding party once (at least).

Romans says that humans have a tendency as they move away from God to move towards sexual perversion.

Feel free to add to the list. My point is that the Bible, being about Jesus as it is, really doesn’t have much to say about sex. I don’t think. Do we need a ‘theology of sex’ more than: ‘Do it in Marriage; don’t if you are single’? Unless we are going to revisit those passages in Leviticus that tell us people shouldn’t be perverted and amoral sexually, that is. I remember learning about sex one time in youth group, I was, oh, 14 or so. The youth group leader said: You can do anything (sexual) within the confines of your marriage. Perhaps this was overstated, but the point was that sex was confined to marriage. Maybe we could teach this stuff in youth groups to kids or in small groups to the young (and old) who driven by their urges and hormones and lust. The point about my learning in marriage was just that. Sex is a very private matter–even if the public makes it a very public matter.

Maybe the Little House on the Prairie version of sex wasn’t too bad after all. We know they did it, but we never saw it or heard about it. (Maybe that’s just naiive.)

I agree with the first thing Merry said about single people and hearing sermons about sex and being uncomfortable. But what also about the widows in the church (oh, right, Paul counseled them too). Do they want to hear about all this stuff?

(Besides, my wife tells me that I wouldn’t be a very good teacher when it comes to this stuff. She says I should stick with stuff I know like…well…uh…well, you get the point.)

your friend,
jerry

ps–I hope we are allowed even a bit of tongue n cheek around here. I’ll leave it up to you to figure out which is which.

Actually I envisioned Chris L. an expert Chutes and Ladders player!

No, I play collectible card games, LotR CCG, specifically…