Archive for June 1st, 2008

Dave Muller from Down Under has ‘discovered’ a new Bible translation: The Calvinist Bible:

Sick of explaining to your unelect friends how the bible writers held the same systematic theology of today, only it was lost before the reformation? Ever wondered how better to read God’s word as He intended it to be in full doctrine glory? Then the CALVINIST Bible was predestined for you!

It’s a rather funny couple of posts, even for Calvinist Christians who don’t like being lumped in with hypers… Some excerpts from this new translation:

For God so loved the elect, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever is called to believeth in him should not perish, but be raptured in the end.
(Joh 3:16)

And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely be condemned to Hell and all man will be guilty of your sin. And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet to submit to him (for Adam did not yet know that the LORD had predestined his wife to eat of the tree).
(Gen 2:16-18)

The next day John seeth Jesus coming unto him, and saith, Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the elect! (John 1:29)

Ye stiffnecked and uncircumcised in heart and ears, ye do always resist the Holy Ghost: as your fathers did, so do ye. (translators note: God predestined them to act as if resisting (since no-one can actually resist God) as part of His purposeful plan of confusion to confound those who can never accept Him anyway) (Acts 7:51)

You’ve gotta wonder if Rick Frueh helped out with the translation (or if he’s still got some additional verses held back)!

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