The following article was submitted by CRN.Info Reader, Steve W. Thank you, Steve!

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I went to a new church the other day. At first, I was having a great time. The pastor spoke for one hour about his favourite topic, which was why 99.999 per cent of the churches out there are apostate.

At first, I was thrilled to hear such a stirring and uplifting message. Pastor Joe gave at least a dozen different examples as to how the modern church differentiates from the early New Testament church. “We’ve replaced this with that and that with this,” Pastor Joe said. “God is angry. He hates these apostate churches.”

He went on about how women should have their heads covered in church and he deplored how modern church youth groups will actually do evil Satanic things like go on trips to waterslide parks.

“The early Christians certainly never took time out from preaching the word in order to go water parks or amusement parks,” he said.

Amen, brother Joe, I thought. All these Satanic forms of entertainment were put there by the devil with the exclusive goal of tearing our eyes from Christ.

But now I come to the sad part of the story.

After the service was over, I walked up to Pastor Joe and kissed him on the cheek.

Pastor Joe did not kiss me back. Instead he looked stunned, and a little angry.

“Why did you do that?” he asked.

I was a little taken aback, but I explained to him that I was merely greeting him with a holy kiss, as the early New Testament church did and as we are instructed to do in Romans 16:16.

Pastor Joe had none of it. He told me not to do that again.

I left that church with great heaviness in my heart. I really thought they were one of the few churches on the straight and narrow, but now I can plainly see that they are just another apostate church that is on the broad road to hell.

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 4th, 2009 at 6:01 pm and is filed under Commentary, Guest Article, satire really. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
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3 Comments(+Add)

1   Phil Miller    http://pmwords.blogspot.com
February 4th, 2009 at 6:06 pm

You should’ve seen the reaction when I stripped down to my underwear and danced like David danced…

2   Rick Frueh    http://http?//followingjudahslion.com
February 4th, 2009 at 8:37 pm

As long as the kiss wasn’t charismatic with the evidence of tongues. :cool:

3   Rick Frueh    http://http?//followingjudahslion.com
February 4th, 2009 at 8:58 pm

Here is the concensus on the topic.

http://www.sliceoflaodicea.com/megachurch-follies/what-do-you-think-about-the-state-of-todays-church-white-horse-inn/

My question is this from a reformed/Calvinistic perspective:

“How can you change God sovereign will on the subject? With all the complaining and murmering about the state of the church, how do you twist God’s sovereign arm to do something about it? Where is the sweeping revival in YOUR church that spills over into those apostate churches and changes them to God’s glory?

That is my question, here is my observation:

Those reformed/Calvinistic complainers and discerners are experts at uncovering what is wrong with the church but they have no power to change it. They claim to teach the pure Word, preach the true Jesus, pray the correct way, sing the right music, and go to the God approved conferences – and yet they continue to “have church” with little or no power within their dark community.

Read the book of Acts, guys, you gotta long way to go. The mote demon has turned your mirror into a telescope.