It has become very apparent over these last few days that there are deeply entrenched camps within the Christian world. If you didn’t already know this it should have been obvious with the reaction over recent issues. Not looking to rehash any of that. But I am going to pose a few questions and thoughts that I hope would help all of us.

In the dialog of debate it is very common for both sides to get passionate. Religion strikes to the core of what most of us hold dear. So obviously when topics involving our strongest convictions get discussed we rally to our cause. Which is a good thing! I wouldn’t want it any other way. I’m always leery of someone who waffles. In certain areas of my life I waffle for fear of upsetting the apple cart. It is the part of me that I most detest but not for the reason many would think. I wish in certain areas I would choose a hill to die on.

During the dialog of recent debate everything from “you’re unregenerate” to “repent and get saved” got thrown around with impunity. These are phrases that really, again, strike at many of our deepest held convictions. Both sides were guilty. I was guilty, maybe not in word, but certainly in thought. It was often in the flurry of comments when I most desperately wanted my way. And that’s where the spiritual battle was lost. It’s never about “my way” and the only “hill to die” on is Golgotha.

Recently I had a conversation with my daughters about us adopting a child. Wanting to gauge where my kids were at I asked them both “What would you think?”. My youngest (6) looked up from lunch and said “I would love someone else to play with”. My oldest (9) looked over at her sister with a grimaced look and then back to me and said “I don’t want to hear anybody else call you Daddy or tell you that they love you”. Isn’t this the way we are in our relationship with God. We sometimes get very selfish with who we allow to interact with our Father. We stubbornly close the door and say “You don’t know how to love him like I do. You’re not allowed in. I don’t want to share him.” I wonder how much we miss out on by not allowing others to show us the richness of their relationship.

In my life I’ve learned things in the most unlikely of situations. With people I absolutely despised I learned to give grace. With people who frustrated me beyond pale I learned patience. With people who made me fearful I learned trust. I suspect that if we all evaluated what God used to craft us we would have similar stories. So in the dialog of debate let’s not assume that the person on the other side of the internet connection is not being used by God to form us.

What if…

We committed to trusting that God was really in control of all of this? Even the stuff we don’t like.

We committed to learning before teaching? Even with the stuff we think is wrong.

We committed to praying before preaching? Even when someone slams our opinion.

We committed to unity before critique? Even when we think their is no common ground between us.

Some may say this is another slick way of saying “Can’t we all just get along?”. To which I respond “Yep”. In scripture disunity was one of things that characterized being far from God and was proof that the enemy was winning. I suspect the world is the watching.

Grace and Peace.

I attended a city council meeting this evening where one of the council men made a motion on hiring city employees and said, “This is the way it should be and if the council decides to do it differently then I am going to vote no on new hires every time from now on no matter what.”  This came from a guy who is a Christian.  Ignoring for a moment how immature this attitude is, it is sometimes the stance we try to take on certain issues (usually issues we feel strongly about).  Those issues vary depending on the person, what kind of church or background they come from, problems they are dealing with currently, etc.

I don’t care what kind of worldview you have (or what kind you think you have), as a church culture in the U.S. we have moved past “This is how it is, I’m right, you’re wrong, deal with it.”  You may not realize it yet, but the moment you take that attitude on any issue, you immediately become irrelevant, regardless of whether you are right nor not.

The reason for your immediate irrelevancy is that you have closed your ears ensuring that you will not listen to the other person, and you have shut down dialogue, ensuring no chance of either of you growing in your understanding of truth.

We’ve all done this.  We all do it.  But as a culture we have moved past this into one of communication towards growth.  This is important for ministers and teachers who can no longer say “Thus saith the Lord” and expect everybody to agree.  The ironic thing about this is that it never worked that way anyway.  Sure, people would nod their heads and accept the voice of the church as authoritative, but the people did not grow, they did not live the authority of Christ in their lives.

This is just the way it is…

*Update – I’ve included some additional information upon request.

It’s an attitude, so it can come out with any issue. Like I said, I’ve done it. For the councilman, it was the issue of new hires. For some of my family, the issue is alcohol consumption, or the observance of communion on Sunday mornings. For me right now? Not sure, that’s part of why I wrote the article to reflect on how effectively I’m helping the people I serve transform. Am I understanding what is right and wrong and then just telling people that’s the way it is and getting mad when they don’t see it? Or am I working with the Spirit of God in bringing that person into the light of Truth so that they understand and want to live it too?

Also, here is a link to a great new article by David Crowder that I think speaks to this issue.  Go check it out.

Ken Silva put out a short notice to his readers today. In it he addresses the Ray Comfort issue that has divided the ODM community all together. I found this quote particularly interesting

All I’m going to do is simply remind everyone that we were only critical of his decision and not of Ray personally or his ministry. So please do not let this issue become divisive us for us here or in the larger Body of Christ. I said what I felt led to say and Ray Comfort, who is a brother in Lord, has said what he felt led to say. Therefore we leave the issue is now in the hands of the Lord

I wish that same grace would have been extended to Rob Bell, Rick Warren, Erwin McManus, etc. when they partnered with people of questionable theology. It is interesting how our tone changes when we have to deal with people and situations closer to home. It is no longer “us vs. them”, but now “us vs. us” in the ODM camp.

I found it even more ironic that the next paragraph was Silva asking for prayer as he pursued more secular speaking engagements. This was then followed by a request for money, and an a paragraph in which he has to explain his often over-the-top tactics.

However, in today’s world this is often confused for personal attack and/or my being unapproachable and/or mean-spirited. But while I am very direct, anyone who has made the time to approach me quickly finds I am hardly mean-spirited but rather committed to God’s Truth as I see it.

It appears that as Apprising and CRN struggle for money in this failing economy, they must back track a bit in their methods. While Silva’s close friends may know the kinder and gentler Ken Silva, most of us only know the fiery writer/prophet that often leaves little to the imagination when it comes to his feelings about certain individuals in the Christian community. In my opinion, it may be too late to recover his reputation in order to finance his ministry

Over at Apprising Ministries, Ken Silva responds to a letter from a reader. Here are a few excerpts that are quite telling of his attitude when it comes to his status

The following is based on an unsolicited email I received here at Apprising Ministries. Please understand that I do not think any pastor-teacher is above reproach [insert typical Emerging Church whining here], etc. [emphasis mine]
What I wish to bring out is how easy, and I’ll argue arrogant as well, it is for people to simply disregard the teaching of someone like myself who has been studying the fields of apologetics, Comparative Religion and evangelizing non-Christian cults for 21 years….

You said: “I was very surprised to see your negative views on Christian meditation in the article CHRISTIAN MEDITATION WITH MANTRA: DOM JOHN MAIN.” So let me put it another way: I am very surprised to see you so quick in attempting to instruct someone like me whom Jesus has called as one of His pastor-teachers. [emphasis mine]

My dad always told me that you could tell alot about someone based on how they respond to correction or constructive criticism. This correspondence to Apprising was in no way instructional or a harsh rebuke. It sounded like an honest reader that was trying to understand where Silva was coming from. Most of the email was actually the reader asking him questions. But, Ken strikes back with his lofty credentials and how a man of his status should not be quickly instructed. How did Silva know that this reader had not spend some time looking at the Apprising articles and made an educated and simply inquisitive inquiry. On top of that, he sends such mixed statements: no pastor is above reproach, but people should not instruct someone who is a pastor-teacher in this manner.

Anyhow, this all too telling of the attitude of both Apprising and CRN:
We are educated, anointed and experienced, therefore we get to criticize whoever we want, whenever we want. And, you better not say anything about it.

My Grandfather used to say “Have mercy” or “mercy” a lot when we would visit (four rowdy kids barging through the door all at once is probably reason enough). It was just another expression of mild woe similar to the Yiddish “oy vey” or a “sheesh” or a “oh my.” I never really thought much of it, other than it was pretty neat because nobody used it anymore. At least not in that way. I said it a lot as a kid. Sort of. When an older brother is smothering you and there’s nothing to do but give in, some sort of phrase calling for mercy was necessary.

Unfortunately, many Christians treat mercy the way my older brothers did. I’m right, you’re wrong, and I’ll beat you up until you give in. They look at mercy as something that is given when the other person submits to them. I suppose you could argue that that is ultimately how it works with God. When we submit ourselves to Him, He gives us mercy. His mercy is offered before we submit, but still contingent on a submission of our will to His.

At first I was going to compare our view of mercy with the use of the word for a generation as slang. But after thinking about it for awhile, maybe they had it right. Maybe our calls for mercy should permeate our daily lives. When we are tempted to roll our eyes and get disgusted, angered, or feel empty pity, we should call for mercy.

I believe that we should judge the sin of our brothers (so that we can restore them), but mercy is more important than judgment. (Note that mercy given is not equal to ignoring or allowing sin.) In fact, mercy is so much more important than judgment that James says to “Speak and act as those who are going to be judged by the law that gives freedom, because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgment!” (2:12-13 NIV)

What do you know, mercy wins.

So for everybody that writes for, comments on, or reads articles posted on this website: “Have mercy!”

Have mercy for each other when another says something condemnable (especially when you’ve probably done it too or wanted to do it.) Can we correct? Yes. But do it gently with a loving heart. If you are angry, perturbed, or whatever, just don’t type. A number of us have shown that we have trouble not sinning in our anger.

I’m sure this post could have been written better. I’m sure I should have said something more, I’m sure that at times I say things I shouldn’t. But please, have mercy.

Tags: anger, correction, love, mercy, sin

Like many conversations, there are certain subjects which rise to the surface from time-to-time, often (and hopefully) becoming clearer over time. One such subject that probably bears another go is that of the language we use – words and sentences.

Setting the Stage

As part of the baseline for this discussion, I would like to borrow and briefly touch on some concepts from this article last fall. Specifically, there are three ways of classifying behavioral beliefs:

Absolutes – those things which are cross-cultural truths, which are demanded or forbidden. To do (or not do) such things is sinful, regardless of the cultural context.

Convictions – those things which are personally convicting, actions which a person believes they should (or should not) do. To do (or not do) such things would be sinning against one’s conscience, and therefore would be sinful. However, convictions are limited to the person or faith community (as with binding and loosing) and cannot be demanded cross-culturally.

Preferences – those things which are personally preferred, based on traditions or likes and dislikes.

Legalism occurs when Preferences or Convictions are raised to the level of Absolutes. This is the sin of the Pharisees. Relativism occurs when Absolutes are lowered to Convictions or Preferences. This is the sin of the Pagans and Hedonists.

Both are to be avoided.

The Words We Use

The Bible has a number of things to say about the words we use. Just a few relevant examples:

Read the rest of this entry »

Today, Ingrid acknowledged here that the Newsweek article she quoted was wrong when they stated that Rick Warren would be meeting with gay father’s this Sunday. She suggests that Newsweek owes her an apology because she and others trusted their “journalistic soundness”.

Perhaps more importantly, Newsweek owes Rick Warren an apology. Perhaps those of us who were too quick to criticize him for something he had no intention of doing should apologize to him as well.

My wife and I have been together for 13 years.  Last Friday we celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary.   Every year on our anniversary I can count on 3 things.

1) I’m gonna get a gift.

2) She’s gonna get a gift.

3) We’re gonna get into an argument.

Every year for the last 10 years we’ve had a minor blow out about something inconsequential and meaningless on our anniversary.  Nonetheless in the heat of the moment we both stake out our positions and commence firing shots at one another.   We speak in coded language.   We flash old battle scars.   Eventually our arguments disinegrate into an adult version of “I know you are but what am I?”  We begin to talk past each other.  Refusing to hear the other side.  Only concerned with voicing our own. 

In a conversation with my Pastor I shared with him about this scenario to which he responded “You fight because the expectations for that day are so high.  One missed step and it all comes crashing down.”   Sadly he’s right.  I have expectations on my wife and she has expectations on me.  If either one of us doesn’t live up to the others expectations we begin to defend our right to have those expectations.  Unfortunately this is counter productive to the unity of our marriage.

Over the last week I’ve witnessed a similar scenario play out in the comments on this blog.  In fact if you follow the blog rabbit hole you can see what I call the “ripple effect”.   Someone lobs a rock into the CRN.info pond and then the ripples spread all across the blogosphere lake.   Those that agree with whatever point was made applaud and cheer the beauty of the ripple from their respective vantage point.   Then another rock is lobbed and on it goes. Rocks get lobbed at ET, Old Truth, Camp on this, etc…   Spiraling further out of control and looking less like Jesus the further it goes.  An adult version of “I know you are but what am I?”

When I argue with my wife the one thing that I am most deeply convicted of every time is “Husbands love your wife like Jesus loved the church and gave his life for it.”   Most days I fail miserably but on the rare occasion I grasp the breadth of that command I watch my wife radiate, secure in what God had intended when he ordained marriage and called it good.

The church that Jesus loved and gave his life for is also commanded to live in unity.   For we are all of the same body.  All given certain gifts.  The hand can not say to the foot I don’t need you. 

Brothers and sisters the expectations are very high.  Because of that let us all walk in the bond of unity that God commanded for the church.  That it may radiate the beauty of Christ.  

Our brother over at Extreme Theology continues to take the high road with regard to how our conversation should always be tempered with gentleness and respect. Quoting this phrase from 1 Peter 3:15, he writes:

I know that I have been guilty of the very behavior I am decrying in this post and I am deeply sorry for committing this sin and repent of it. That being said, I am appealing to all of my Christian brothers and sisters who have a passion for defending the truth and defending the gospel to repent of ad hominem and personal attacks and let your actions and statements and debates always be seasoned with love, compassion, gentleness and respect.

I agree. And, I for one, will join him in asking for forgiveness and the grace to temper all of my future posts and comments with gentleness and respect. Moreover, I have NO doubt that when he ultimately posts his take on the PD conference, he will NOT be in agreement with all that was said there.

That’s OKAY.

As we engage in a conversation with him about ministry philosophy, the role of sola scriptura in our churches, and the centrality of preaching Christ crucified for our sins, let’s take this opportunity to model what we stand for here at CRN.info which is summarized so clearly and succinctly in the passage that Chris R quoted:

but in your hearts regard Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good hehavior in Christ may be put to shame. 1 Pet 3:15, 16.

Notice, it is the “good behavior in Christ” that Peter is highlighting here as being the salt and light aspect of our witness, not the cleverness of our defense. So, let’s all take a deep breath and honor Christ in our tone as the conversation continues.