Working with (and having worked with) folks who are living in the same-sex lifestyle, and keeping in mind society’s perception of the church’s mistreatment of such individuals (a perception that is sometimes real, and not undeserved), we do live in a tension, where we cannot “give in” and call what God calls sin “good”, while at the same time not treating it as a worse sin that the ones most Christians deal with (and commit) in their own lives.

“Not giving offense” is not always wrong, particularly in public settings as opposed to small group or one-to-one settings, and if needlessly “giving offense” drives sinners away from the church and hardens their hearts (and ears) to the Gospel, then perhaps being careful in our language and slow to single this particular sin out in public is not unwise. Jesus told the woman caught in adultery “I do not condemn you”, showing her grace, but followed with “go and sin no more”, recognizing that it is not OK to continue in that lifestyle.

I spoke with a family member last week, who goes to a medium-sized, quite conservative church. He said that there was a lesbian couple who had attended services there for several years, and over time they came to realize their sin and that they needed to leave that life and come to Christ. That church, which I grew up in, has never considered homosexual sex to be acceptable, but they have refrained from addressing it from the pulpit, though they did bring in a group that specifically ministers to people living with the temptations of same-sex attraction to speak to the church at one of their Sunday evening services. By dealing with it as something that should break our heart and something that can be worked through, rather than conflating “same-sex attraction” (the temptation) and “homosexual sex” (the sin) under the banner of “gay” or “homosexuality”, this church has found a way to “thread the needle” between grace and truth.

Andy Stanley’s church in Atlanta is striving to do the same.

unfortunately, most christians do not see the items on the lists as equal sins. so we do not find street-preachers protesting greed or gossip. (in fact, many i have seen revel in the latter)… but they love to “share the gospel” with gays,.

I’m not trying to speak in circles here.

Obviously, a balance is required. But in my experience, when my emphasis is on being right and proving I’m right, grace often takes a back seat.

I’ve attempted above to show that I am right, and I may be. The question is was I gracious about it?